Cooking for Two-Recipe of the Week

RECIPE TO FOLLOW___ Cooking has always been a huge part of my daily family routine.  I love to cook, and good nutrition and great flavor along with strict adherence to a family dinner hour have been priorities that have served us all well.  But my adjustment to the empty nest (and the lethargy and apathy that can go along with it) has dampened my “kitchen spirits” a bit.  Don even predicted that I would go into a “food funk”  following the departure of Austin.  He’s been pretty tolerant of such dinner fare as microwave Kettlecorn, tortilla chips and Chocolate Reisen’s and microwave pizza, but I notice he’s looking a bit thin and, (so NOT fair) that I’m appearing more dough-y.  In his honor and in an effort not to lose my passion for what I love, I’ve strung on the ol’ apron again.

I’m finding that cooking for two can be a challenge, but it can also be fun.  I’m no longer feeding a perfectly tuned, calorie-burning teen-aged machine and can customize our menus not just based on our preferences but on our lower caloric needs.  And best of all, IT’S FALL!!  In the Northwest, that means farmer’s markets bulging with fall crops.  I’m blessed to live two blocks from an orchard/vineyard/winery that hosts its own market. Today, I couldn’t resist the fat, juicy Heirloom tomatoes still warm from the Sun, and I also grabbed a bunch of basil and a just-baked sourdough baguette.  A local creamery’s award-winning cheeses are also featured at the winery, so I snagged a ball of fresh mozzarella and rounded it all out with razor thin slices of prosciutto.

BIG bonus of being an empty nester…My meal tonight is one my son has never enjoyed, but with Austin gone we can have it whenever we like.  Bon appetit, to us and to any of you who give it a try.

Heirloom Tomato, Mozzarella and Proscuito Stack w/Balsamic Vinaigrette

Ingredients:

2  Heirloom Tomatoes (i like to mix yellow and red for color) ** 1 Ball fresh mozzarella**1 bunch basil ** 4 ozs thinly-sliced proscuitto ** 1 baguette (Sourdough, French or your favorite) ** One clove of garlic, halved ** Nesta’s Favorite Balsamic Vinaigrette (recipe below)

Nesta’s Favorite Balsamic Vinaigrette

2 tablespoons aged Balsamic vinegar ** 4 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil ** 1 teaspoon Dijon mustard ** 1 teaspoon (packed) brown sugar.

Combine vinegar, mustard and brown sugar; stir to blend. Slowly add olive oil, one tablespoon at a time, while constantly whisking (or slap it all in a jar and shake like crazy to blend).  Set aside

Thick-slice washed tomatoes; salt and pepper to taste. Slice the mozzarella, approximately 1/2 inch thick per slice. Cut the basil into ribbons. Cut baguette into rounds (1/2 inch to 1 inch thick) and lightly toast them under broiler. Rub surface of each slice with the garlic immediately after removal.

To assemble, place one slice of bread on a plate and alternately stack tomatoes, cheese, proscuitto and basil and drizzle a thin amoount of vinaigrette over each layer.  If desired, you can stack slices of bread intermittently as well.  We like to hold most of the bread on the side and use it to dip into the extra vinaigrette.  Salt and pepper the completely stack as desired, drizzle a bit more vinaigrette over the top and serve.

It’s beautiful, simple and surprisingly filling.  If you can’t find Heirlooms, any beefy tomato variety will do.  We like to have this with a cold bottle of Pinot Noir (our local vineyard makes a good one) or Chardonnay.

Give it a try over the weekend and let me know what you think.

To Text or Not to Text: Are You a “Helicopter Parent”?

One of my biggest fears about becoming an empty nester was losing the open, communicative relationship with my son that has been 18 years in the making. So, after hearing about his first forays into college life in decent detail (the girls, his classes, the parties, the girls, his triumphs on the intramural gridiron, his professors, the girls), I’ve celebrated.  Yeah, baby, Nesta’s still got it!

But I read an article last year that has stuck with me and left me unsettled.  Basically, the message was a warning to parents of college kids:  Beware the prolific communicator-he may not be developing properly.  After waking up this morning to a long text from Austin about how happy he is, I searched for the story again (link below).  As if swine flu and bad grades and campus muggings weren’t enough, now I get to add to my list of concerns “helicopter parenting”.  I’ve read this three times this morning, trying to see if I qualify.

http://www.abc15.com/content/news/webxtra/story/How-NOT-to-helicopter-your-kids-at-college/etQGE5ivN0mPA7xGDL5LwQ.cspx

O.K., so frequency of communication isn’t the main issue.  Imposing your will over decisions that should be made by your student is the big problem. Feeling more comfortable now…I’ve absorbed his descriptions eagerly, but I haven’t tried to martial nor structure his experience.  Score one for me!

Not so fast, though.  There’s also ample warning against being a soundboard for frustrations, things that should be shared with other’s in his circle and worked out on his own for better development.  Almost on cue, I got a text this morning from my kiddo.  The gist of it is his Constitutional outrage over an unscheduled room visit by the Fire Marshall.  An extension cord improperly installed is his offense, and he was IN THE SHOWER when they invaded.  He’s been given a remedy, but will probably be written up by the RA.  And he’s fired up, ready with all sorts of comebacks that center around his privacy rights (uh, you have none sweetie-read you contract). 

I’m concerned about the tone he may take with his RA and how it might affect him going forward.  And I’d like to tell him that, but I’m heeding advice from this article, even though it’s against my nature:  Not all communications need to be answered. This is a test for me and for my son.  Will the world stop spinning if I ignore this one?  How will he react? And how long can I hold out?

Helicopter parent…I’m not sure I am one, but just in case I’m determined to crash that craft, right here and now.  I got a one-word text from Aus about 15 minutes ago.  “HELLO?” Reeling from the newness of the empty nest, I have to admit it’s nice to still be needed.  But my son also needs me to show some confidence in his ability to “work it out”, and so I’m still ignoring the phone. 

What about you?  Parenting-by-proxy, helicopter parenting…How have you avoided it, or fallen into the trap?

P.S.  Victory!  Just got a “resolution text” from Aus.  Hmmm…Seems I’m not as necessary as I thought.  I should feel good about this, right?

From Cool, Young Mom to Older Parent…Overnight

I woke up in a sweat last night and as much as I’d like to blame it on hormones, I can’t.  This one is courtesy of my son’s last comments as we left him at his university dorm. He marveled at how weird it will be to see my husband and I every few months instead of every day.  Don and I blinked back tears.  Not seeing his smile every day is the part we both have dreaded every day for months now.  How poignant, we both were thinking, that we all shared this feeling. It was, as they say, a “moment”.  Right up until our kiddo smashed it with this:

“I’ll really be able to see how much you’re aging now.”

Crap.  Don and I had been giving each other pep talks, and his main battle cry of late was to be prepared for how different Austin will be even when he comes home for Thanksgiving.  O.K., so he’ll be more independent and maybe even leave the toilet seat down. I can deal. Stupid me, though.  I hadn’t thought about the changes he might notice in us. And so there I was last night, bolt upright in bed, left only with the implications of Austin’s simple declaration to contemplate.  How will his perception of me change over time, the son who has always taken a bit of pride in having a youthful mom? 

And it hit me.  I had just joined the ranks of those whom I had previously thought of as a group quite apart from me.  Now I was really awake, because I realized that it wasn’t just Austin who would view me differently.  People like me (o.k., who I was yesterdy) would now think of me, refer to me, even react to me as an “older parent with grown children”. 

Have I stayed “young” only because I’ve had to keep up with the changing lingo, music, styles and whims of a teen?  My mind raced as I thought of all the “older parents with grown children” I know. Now that I’ll be out of the loop, will I also be hopelessly “out of it”? Am I resigned to a life of knitting, public television, senior discounts and AARP meetings now that I’m an empty nester?  I got out of bed-twice-to examine my face and I swear there are new lines that weren’t there yesterday.  The panic was rising, and I needed a touchstone so I woke Don up to ask all these questions and more in rapid fire style. 

God Bless the long-suffering husbands of the world.  Don reassured me that I looked the same as the day he met me (I was thirteen with braces, but I’ll take it), that I’m still VERY cool, and that AARP memberships aren’t even offered to 45 year old women.  He patted my arm and rolled over, and I was left to grin sheepishly in the dark.  The last thing I remember thinking kept me in a deep slumber the rest of the night:  I’ll always have at least part of my youth as long as I continue to be so immature!

How do YOU stay young, now that the kids are gone?  Am I the silliest woman on Earth, or did you have these feelings?  Love to hear your take. —- Nesta